It's time to let loose!

As a child, I was really drawn to crafty things... I devoured them year 'round, as a self-occupying only child of a hard-working (three jobs at a time, sometimes! Days at the county finance department and picking up any waitressing shifts she could at local places) single mom. I'd make little doves made of paper and spring-loaded clothespins to hang in the windows, potholders, string translucent beads on shoelaces and random embroidery floss that my great-grandmother had left in an inherited desk drawer, break apart ruined audio tapes>yank out the tape>paint them like suncatchers, freeze movies to sketch people's eyes... I really loved (LOVE) drawing eyes. Anything that wasnted wanted, I would make something from... I was a hoarder of all things that no one else wanted.

Three children, a home and 8 years of my husband later, I'm finding myself looking for some way to express the ME that has been buried by busy-ness. Our first home has occupied me for nearly three years now... there's little left to do unless I suddenly come up with the kind of money that would allow me to rip off the roof above the kitchen and build a few new rooms that would seriously make this room Rock.Out.Loud. lol. Those DIY projects were GREAT for releasing my frustrations... with life, relationships, comfort, self... but I have a lot of leftover emotional chatter. There's only so much I can say to my ear-weary husband, who never stops me... he knows I just need to get it out while he stays silent. But it's not getting out... I'm repeating myself.

So I'm going to try my hand at painting. It may not be much but if I can form what I'm feeling, perhaps it will actually get out. And maybe the good things my soul is repeating to me can stay out and be preserved. I need it. I always want to be "productive"... to contribute... and all of this inner chatter is stopping me from doing so many things. They're an emotional block to the rest of me.

We'll see what happens...

Oh yes- the pinot noir IS handy!

 Ahhh- what to let out first? I stained the canvas, slightly, with a tea wash earlier...

 Not to be outdone - ever - Evie joined in for a little show...

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Be still- be restful- explore your deepest self in these dark days of winter...